Drew and friends were sharing their mothers’ preferred cuss word. Apparently, I was one of the D-moms. When Drew told me on the way home from school, I felt a little foolish. He tried to make me feel better by saying, “at least you aren’t the F-mom!”
I do not enjoy reading about God’s wrath spilling over in judgment. As I keep growing in my understanding of His character, I am still somewhat conflicted by how mercy and justice co-exist. And yet, they do so perfectly in the Lord who is my Priest-King.
I think I am like most of my readers in that I love to watch an epic battle where good overcomes evil. To witness the courageous struggle when the stakes couldn’t be higher is riveting. In real life, all I need to do is just show up. The battle is the Lord’s.
As I cry for spiritual renewal, heartache of some kind is what God uses to change me. He tries the easy way, but I don’t listen. Heartache is what seems to get my attention. Why is that? Why can’t I learn the easy way?
I am a thief. I shoplifted multiple times from a department store when I was in Jr High. And I never got caught. Even though, I didn’t feel good about it, I wasn’t ready to plead for God’s mercy.
Are there people so evil I do not even want God to save them? Is it okay if I hate them? After all the wickedness they have done, they do not deserve God’s grace.
Am I an open book before God? I like to think that I welcome Him to search me completely and know me fully. But if I am being honest, there are some things I am tempted to hide.
I fear God is not going to come through for me. Or if He does, how long am I going to have to wait? God is not working fast enough and the struggle feels larger in the waiting.
I am becoming convinced my view of God is the key to living with the blessings of life He promised. What I am learning is to see God bigger!
